Trying not to complain...

*Breathe in*

-pause-

*Breathe out*

I will try not to complain, so instead its Straits Times articles time:

From The Straits Times:

Feb 27, 2005

Marry him, Fann

No longer a spring chicken at 34, is it 'time' Fann Wong marries Christopher Lee? Or does such an attitude demean women?

Sumiko Tan

YOU have noticed that I haven't been dwelling on the topics of love, marriage and relationships of late, it's deliberate.

When I started writing this Sunday column in 1994, hardly a few months went by when I didn't lament my singlehood. Musing on past, present and future romances was a constant theme.

But it's one thing to be hung up on love when you're in your eligible 20s and still-available 30s, and another when you've hit 40.

When you're 40 and still unmarried, it's unbecoming to be seen as pining for romance. In fact, it's desperate and pathetic.

Like it or not, the search for love and marriage is regarded as a privilege of the young.

While 40 isn't exactly 'old', it certainly can't be considered young, and pity a single woman of that age bemoaning her marital status in public.

The reason I'm revisiting the issue is Fann Wong.

Last week, the Life! section of The Straits Times carried a report speculating on how she and her alleged boyfriend, fellow TV artiste Christopher Lee, are getting married at last.

Both are 34.

One of the actress' fans was quoted as saying: 'At her age, it's also time she got married.'

It's a sentiment I share.

In the larger scheme of things, 34 isn't old (especially if you are, like me, 41). But when it comes to marriage, it's getting there.

If she loves Christopher, Fann should marry him, I think. And quickly.

A colleague was indignant when she heard this.

'How can you say something like that?' she asked.

I suppose views like mine do reinforce stereotypes about women.

Stereotypes such as how women - even beautiful, talented and rich ones like Fann - have sell-by dates, and if they miss the boat, will be left on the shelf, pardon the mixed metaphors.

Stereotypes like how women lose their attractiveness when they grow older.

Stereotypes like how women desire to be attractive to men.

Stereotypes like how, without a romantic partner, a woman's life isn't complete.

I'm going to get flak for saying this, but, guess what? I believe there is truth to all those stereotypes.

Women do have sell-by dates.

Women are physically less attractive as they age.

Women do want to appeal to men.

And having a man in one's life is better than none.

WHEN the HBO sitcom Sex And The City was launched in 1998, I, like so many other single, independent women in cities around the world, was charmed.

How we loved the antics of Carrie and gang as they flitted from one romance to another, loving and leaving men and giving them as good as they got.

The characters spoke for us liberated women on the cusp of the 21st century. We could take on men on our terms.

But the magic for me wore thin after a few seasons.

The older the characters grew (and the actresses too, visibly), the more their lives appeared more strained than swinging.

It's acceptable when you're in your early 30s to work a room full of men, showing off your cleavage. But when you're approaching 40 and still doing this, something must be wrong in your life.

Besides, much as the characters were depicted as gutsy and independent, what they were all chasing in the end was the man of their dreams.

They wanted a relationship or marriage, to be with a man and be looked after by him.

The sitcom drew to a neat close last year with all the characters happily partnered.

In real life, of course, this doesn't always happen. Many swinging single women don't have a happily ever after.

My theory is that 35 is the make-or-break age of a woman in the marriage market.

Miss it - either through lack of choice or because you are too busy or fussy to commit - and it will take extraordinary luck or hard work for you to claw back into the market and get hitched.

This is because 35 is also, alas, that age when one's looks start heading south (just check out those forehead lines that seemingly appear overnight).

And no matter how men and women will say otherwise, in the game of courtship, youthful looks always fare better than craggy ones. It's just a fact of life.

BEING still-single at 40 is a strange experience.

On the one hand, there's that part where your heart can still skip a beat when you meet someone dishy. On the other, you realise that you must finally start behaving with at least some adult decorum. It's just so sad to still be squealing over a 'cute guy'.

Complicating the matter is how, most times, you actually find yourself just not that interested anymore.

Dating is boring and meaningless, and a stress-free, asexual lifestyle with your dog and TV actually sounds inviting, especially when you come home pooped from work.

Yet, when you see happily married couples and their children around you, you feel a twinge of What If.

So, if I were 34 again and in Fann's shoes, what would I do?

Marry before I hit 35 or it'll be 'too late'? Or luxuriate a while more in singlehood, shelf-life be damned?

All things considered, I'd choose marriage.

If you are so lucky as to ever discover The One, don't let him slip away.

Because, as someone who has been there, but hadn't done that, you wouldn't want to wake up at 40 and regret it.

All along I knew women had a tougher lot in life, and I guess this merely serves to confirm it. A man at 35 is still very eligible, but a woman who is single at 35 is quite jialat already. That is if you subscribe to the view that marriage is the most important thing in life. I am not sure about you all, but I do. Of course there are other important things like taking care of your parents and your friends etc, but I do think that companionship is the MOST important thing. The last thing you want is to be working till late at 45, bring home a big pile of homework to mark, and then realise you are facing 4 walls alone. Got to cook for yourself, wash your own clothes etc (not that companion is equal to maid but you get the drift...). And what about the 'friends' argument? I have always been one to believe that the older you get, the more responsibilities you have, and thus the less time you have to spend with your friends. I mean, who has time to go kopitiam to watch football when you ahve to queue up outside Ai Tong Pri School to get your kid into Pri 1? You get the idea... So all you VS dudes out there, if you fly my aeroplane because of girl, I won't mind. I will understand ;)



From The Straits Times:

Feb 27, 2005

Failure No. 2: Haw Par Villa

Too gross, too hot - to succeed

HAW Par Villa was garish grottoes and frightening friezes of gods, spirits and animals from Chinese mythology. Entry to the park - built by two brothers in 1937 - was free but it slowly fell into disrepair, so the Government took it over in 1988.

Given its reputation for the macabre, investors believed that a jazzed-up version would attract regional tourists, especially superstitious middle-aged Chinese folk who may have had, in their youth, seen the original.

A joint venture undertook a $80 million remodelling and when it reopened in October 1990, the old 1.9 hectares had grown to 9.5 hectares while its static sculptures had been brought to life with electronic gadgetry. A boat ride down steep slides, as well as high-tech indoor theatres to tell Chinese folklore, were also added.

For the one-price ticket - $16 for adults and $10 for kids - everything past the gate was at your disposal. Its novelty value drew in 1.2 million visitors the first year, and a tiny profit - before interest charges. But the second year saw $1.8 million in losses and, every year afterwards, it bled. In 2001, it closed.

What went wrong?

First, the new park dissed its target group. Designed by a Disney offshoot who assumed it would attract American tourists, says NTU's Prof David Leong, Chinese stories were told through Western eyes, so Chinese-speaking visitors found the old spirit gone. The Creation of the World slide show, for instance, was presented in English.

It was not until 1995 that the operator would use Chinese to describe the exhibits and in its theatres, while stilt walkers and modern pop dancers gave way to opera artistes from China.

Secondly, it dissed you once you paid at the gate. It had too much concrete and too few shelters - like Tang Dynasty City - which made it too hot on sunny days. Yet people had to queue in the hot sun for 40 minutes to take the Ride into the Dragon's Belly, for example, because there were only two boats at any one time despite a capacity for four. Although only one person was needed to man each boat, the operator cut its workforce to curb rising wage costs, thinking that since it was a one-price ticket, long queues wouldn't directly impact upon revenues.

Thirdly, it dissed tour agents, who were not paid any commissions. Prof Peggy Teo of NUS found in her survey that only a quarter of tour agents promoted Haw Par Villa.

Finally, it dissed people with a phobia about death, which is most people. It also turned off potential customers offended by its assault on the senses with a profusion of sex and gore themes. In its Ten Courts of Hell, for example, 'wandering spirits' - actors lying in the tunnel who rose to waylay guests - sent many visitors scurrying away, screaming in terror.

Where it wasn't ghoulish, it was distasteful, like the tableau extolling filial piety, where a legendary Tang Dynasty woman suckled her toothless mother-in-law while her infant starved.

So the place created not warm memories but grossed out or ghoulish ones.

In March 1997, entrance fees were slashed, but a third of its attractions were closed too and staffing reduced from 400 to 20. Things were battered and tawdry. It was too little, too late.

From 750,000 visitors in 1995, attendance dropped to 130,000 in 2001 and the operator threw in the towel.

Hmm I not sure whether you all went there when you were young before, I did and I was absolutely terrified by all the punishments dished out in the 18th level of Hell. What absolutely freaked me out was that you would be forced to hug a red hot pillar if you had sex with a woman (or at least I though so then) and I was like wtf! Am I supposed to be a monk then? Needless to say it had a very big impact on me, for better or for worse... Today there was one letter to the forum which argued that Haw Par Villa helped to promote Chinese culture etc. I think I can agree with both views. Haw Par Villa does help to promote Chinese culture which was the original aim of the 2 brothers who built it. But as a theme park, it did commit the error of being too gross and scary. Think Disneyland rides and compare it to THAT ride in Haw Par Villa and you get what I mean.

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No I haven't got my laptop back, but still blogged coz there are just too many things to say. But without my laptop I can't talk about a lot of stuff. The list:

1. Anti-Glazer protest before Milan game
2. Rooney in the Portsmouth game
3. How I came within 5 cm of getting Ruud's autograph, only to fail :(

Anyway fuck doodleboard. Converted to a premium service onl website. FUCK YOU. This is how McDonalds and Nike came about. They started out as small friendly family enterprises and got popular before slowly turning into giant unfeeling conglomerates. Fuck.

The End

I rally don't know what to say. A whole lot of complaints inside me. Even the last glimmer of hope had been taken away from me.

Todat is supposed to be the 4th working day. And so I called IBM again. And no, nothing has been done yet. I asked the person to phone up the service centre to ask them what is happening. He instead put in a request for them to call me. And how long will it take? "Usually within 24 hours". I am willing to bet all my money in my bank account that come 3 pm tomorow, I won't get a single call from them. And the person said the 4 working days is just a "best endeavour".

SO FUCKING WHAT??? If you can't solve the problem within 4 working days shouldn't you at least inspect what is the problem and call and give a definite time frame which the person can expect to give his machine back? I am left grabbing the hope that I will be able to hear about the problem within 4 days, but left 4 days, right 4 days and I still haven't heard anything. What hope can I cling onto that I will hear anything AT ALLLLLLL?????? I tried to be optimistic, I tried to be hopeful, but day after day after day just brings disappointment. What reasons do I have to cheer up and be optimistic? Short of trying to go to Brentford and bash into the service centre, I really don't know what else I can do.

It is in times like these that i really detest the fact that I am not rich. if I am rich, i can just go to Tottenham Court Road and buy another laptop. End of story. No whining. No camping in cluster. I can listen to all my songs, sort out all my photos, key in my expenditures into Excel, read Stratis Times online without having to log on every single time. But no, I can't do that. Money is not everything, but it is the single most important thing. Maybe I should just fucking rob a bank.

And Roy Carroll did nothing to cheer me up at all. Fucking snowing in Manchester and freezing cold. Uncomfortable coach rides to and fro, to see a silly 1-0 defeat. Fuck Roy Carroll.

This will be my last ever post. This blog has brought nothing but bad luck. I think you all are sick and tired of me complaining all the time. I am pissed off at myself for having nothing positive to say at all. So its goodbye forever.

Fuck IBM, fuck Indians, fuck DHL, fuck Carroll, fuck 9am tutorials, fuck MOE, fuck no money.

Bayern 3-1 Arsenal

-2 degree Celsius temperature, away from home, against a traditionally hard to beat team, you would want your players to be real men out there and dig in. No matter where I look at the Arsenal team today, there wasn't a single player out there who I would want standing beside me in a dark alley facing a group of yobs. The only one was Sol Campbell and he was missing. Flamini looks like one but he is still young. The rest of the Arsenal team were just falling down, jumping away from challenges and basically looking like they were in need of a hot cup of Milo in Singapore and not playing football in the snow.

To prove my point? Anybody noticed how many Arsenal players wore gloves during the match? Every single one of the outfield players bar Gael Clichy wore gloves. Fucking sissies. In contrast, when I look at Man United, I can see real men everywhere. Rio, Heinze and Gary Neville in defence, Keane in midfield, and Rooney in attack. Those are real men whom you can count on to dig in when the going gets tough. In fact, you can bet your life that Keane and Gary will be wearing short sleeves tomorrow even in the snowy weather.

Arsenal at their best play really sweet free flowing, fast paced, accurate attacking football. But they still haven't learnt how to graft, and that will remain their Achilles Heel as long as Wenger doesn't take a long hard look at himself.

Stratford --> Brentford = Longest distance in the world

Yet another day, yet another call to IBM, yet another negative response.

Ang moh accent: Yeah, I remember now, I spoke to you yesterday isn't it?
Me: Yup
Ang moh accent: Let me just check it for you. *pause* It's still at our depot, sorry I meant service centre at the moment. It's still waiting to be picked up by an engineer.

-HELLO?!?! Didn't you say somebody was already looking at it yesterday?!?!?!?! WTF?-

Ang moh accent: It's in our service centre in Brentford

Do you guys know what this means? It means that DHL actually took THREE working days to transport my laptop from Stratford in east London to Brentford in west London. Dont believe me?

To see where Stratford is, click here
To see where Brentford is, click here (if you click the arrow on the right side you will see Stratford eventually)

*Can we have a big round of applause please for DHL?*

I mean seriously wtf? Why did the stupid Indian (yes its another argument AGAINST outsourcing) tell me to bring it to Stratford in the east when all DHL does is to take THREE BLOODY WORKING DAYS (remember my emotions don't fucking switch off during Sat and Sun and so that's FIVE DAYS in total) to transport it across London to Brentford in the west? I can go up to Manchester and back again IN ONE FUCKING DAY.

BECAUSE INDIANS LIVING HALFWAY AROUND THE GLOBE DON'T FUCKING KNOW THAT THE SERVICE CENTRE IS IN BRENTFORD AND THEIR SUGGESTIONS ARE WASTING PRECIOUS TIME!

I can just imagine my T23 shivering in the cold, snowy weather in Brentford, separated from its loving master and its warm home in John Dodgson House, and crying out for its master to take him home.

Ang moh accent: If you don't hear from us by Tuesday...oh wait today IS Tuesday, sorry I meant if you do not hear from us by Thursday, give us a ring and we will chase it for you.

-Thanks, so the 4 working days wait actually starts from the day it lands in Brentford, which wasn't told to me by the stupid Indian accent-

Ang moh accent: (after I had asked him)After the 4 days and it had been repaired, it will normally take about 1 working day before we deliver it to you.

Great, which basically means I am looking at Friday, or more realistically next Monday or Tuesday before I get my laptop back - IF they do look at it before Thursday.

By that time, either I had killed someone, or I had killed myself in frustration. But before that, let's all pray that the DHL workers all have their laptops or computers break down and let them see the effect of their inefficient actions.

Patience Shihua....patience...

Good evening viewers, welcome to TBC's (TosH Broadcasting Corporation) daily update on the war to rescue Emperess IBM T23.

Latest reports from our correspondents in IBM's service centre indicate that valuable ammunition (i.e box containing IBM Thinkpad T23) had only arrived at the frontline today, a whopping FOUR working days after they had been despatched to the military base at Stratford. General Ang-moh-accent could do nothing but apologise for the cock up by DHL SAME DAY (name of the service...like yes...same day arrive), the military's OUTSOURCED transport division. He promised to speed up the despatching of the ammunition to frontline soldiers (ie technicians) so that they can fight the battle for Emperor TosH, whose health had been deteriorating daily since his Emperess IBM T23 had been abducted by mysterious enemy forces. In fact, as we were having radio correspondence, he claims some soldiers are already starting to make advances into enemy ground (i.e looking at my laptop).

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Yes, fuck. After days of hair pulling and frustration, I STILL have to wait. No idea whatsoever whether its covered by warranty or not. Hopefully what the guy said is true, that it wouldn't take long to repair it :( *pray* At least its with IBM now I guess. However, something tells me that DHL won't be my courier service of choice especially if a service called DHL SAME DAY takes FOUR days to deliver something.

Its snowing in London (though most of the time I am stuck in the basement cluster room and not able to see it...). At first I was pretty negative about the snow (esp considering the last time it snowed in UK I missed my Bolton game entirely). But soon I realised that this is quite possibly the last time ever that I will see snow. I began to have nice little fantasies about strolling through white fluffy stuff, making snowman and having snow fights.... Until I saw that the snow melted immediately upon touching the floor and there was not enough snow to even cover the road, let alone make a snow man. *sigh*

Anyway my Masters' application letter is finally in, my tutor finally got down to writing it this morning after seeing my email. Even profesors procrastinate too!!

Newcastle 1 Chelsea 0

Wah lan...what a match... first time I see a team as suey as Chelsea. Mourinho put on 3 subs at halftime to change the game as Chelsea were 1-0 down and within 5 mins of the restart Wayne Bridge had to go ff injured and Chelsea were left with 10 men. Cudicini then got sent off for bringing Ameobi down and Glen Johnson had to go into goal as no more substitutes can be brought on. You really wonder if Souness had put some 'gong tao' on the pitch...

A lot of people might be gloating at Chelsea but personally I feel rather disappointed. I want United to win the league but I want them to win it with Chelsea having their full complement of players available. If not it leaves the jibye feeling of Chelsea having lost it only because they had a lot of players injured. I want them to have no excuses whatsoever. In any case, it also denies us the chance to see if Chelsea can stop the Barcelona juggernaut and vice versa. So perhaps perversely, I want the injured Chelsea players to recover quickly so that United can beat them.

Having said that, I still think Chelsea will win the league. The fucking weak team still dominated against Newcastle until Shearer crocked Bridge....

On a different note, my neighbour is a fucking bastard. He blasted his bhangra music at 445am and woke lim bei up. Chao Jibye... I knocked on the wall and still he didn't stop. I went to knock on his door and he didn't even dare to open his door. Fucking coward. It was only until 6 plus am before I could drift off back to sleep again. Fucking waste of his father's orgasm.

You know what? Fuck the stand up speak up campaign. British Indians DESERVE to be racially abused and killed. I am not mincing my words. ALL OF THEM DESERVE TO DIE.

Terribly upset

Straits Times surfing in the cluster room...xian...

From The Straits Times:

Forget V Day, how about E Day?

I used to yearn for Valentine's Day and grand romantic gestures. Now, I treasure the little things in Every Day that convey love

Tee Hun Ching

I WAS 18 when I was treated to my first 'proper' Valentine's Day date. You know, the sort that comes with the obligatory car pick-up, the standard floral bouquet and a dinner reservation at a softly-lit restaurant in town.

The stuff that young girls' dream dates are made of, basically.

I forget what I wore or the name of the now-defunct eatery. But I can still recall how the tables, each sporting a flickering candle and a stalk of red rose, were packed so tightly together that we could literally rub shoulders with the couples to our left and right.

We hardly spoke, for fear that our neighbours would snigger at our private jokes.

The food, presumably churned out with assembly line efficiency to feed the amorous throngs, was cold.

And when the bill came, my NSman date blanched, but swiftly handed over two $50 bills.

'Isn't the set dinner here $20 each?' we whispered, shocked, as his hard-earned pay disappeared with the waiter. The night that started out pregnant with promise fizzled out quickly.

That was my first reality check on the giant commercial conspiracy otherwise known as Valentine's Day, when all things that help to fan the flames of love burn a larger-than-usual hole in your pocket.

That was also the last time I welcomed bouquets and dinner invitations for Feb 14.

It wasn't just the sheer waste of money that pained me. It was also the realisation that the day would never live up to its promise.

By expecting to be swept off your feet on this day of orchestrated love, you would already have eliminated a vital ingredient for romance - spontaneity.

When I was younger, I thought love, or what slippery grasp I had of the concept, was best expressed in grand, showy gestures that told the whole world how desirable I was.

In secondary school, I fantasised about getting V Day song dedications on the radio from secret admirers.

In junior college, I would scan a two-page affair crammed with love messages that the student council culled from love-sick peers, half-hoping to see one dedicated to me.

I imagined my friends teasing me about it as I squirmed outwardly but cheered inwardly - a mental picture that never translated into reality.

The candlelight dinner was as close to a Valentine's Day ego trip as I ever got.

After that fell flat, I sniffed at the crass money-spinner disguised as a rose-covered love fest and began to value intangibles like creativity instead.

An artistic ex left me wordless with a classy black scrapbook he made that showcased evidence of our time together: ticket stubs of the first movie we caught together, a paper napkin speckled with his half-baked love poems scribbled playfully as we killed time in a fast food outlet.

I found it touching that events I dismissed as mundane mattered enough for him to preserve memories of them, simply because I was a part of those moments.

Till today, this remains the best Valentine's Day surprise I ever had.

Now, married and much older, I subscribe to the slogan of the Romancing Singapore campaign first launched in 2003. Love, I realise, really is in the little things, best exemplified in everyday life.

I smile when I see a new toothbrush sitting in the tumbler that used to hold my sad, old one with its cobalt blue bristles faded to the colour of the sky and spread out like a starburst.

If he's sensitive enough to spot such small needs, I figure he will never miss the big ones.

I luxuriate in the unspoken arrangement where I simply sit pretty and wait for my food while he navigates the sweaty crowds whenever we step into a hawker centre.

He never grumbles about how it should be my turn, for he doesn't keep count of who does more.

I'm touched when he makes an effort to dress up for outrageous theme parties thrown by my friends, even though I know he would very much prefer to curl up with a book at home.

I'm grateful when he automatically reaches out to massage the small of my back when I get home after a long day to relieve my chronic back ache.

I'm ashamed when I snap at him, accusing him of 'always doing this' after he forgets to bring in the laundry twice in a row, only to hear him say gently: 'Not always lah.'

Anyone else would have blasted my inability to count, for by what stretch of imagination could 'twice' be equated with 'always'? But he rarely loses his cool and inspires me to follow suit, although I must admit this is an uphill task for me.

I no longer scoff at Valentine's Day, for who says it always has to be celebrated in style?

To those who take their partners for granted, it is a gentle reminder that for once in 365 days, they should snap out of their selfish reverie.

To those who mark each day with their loved ones as Feb 14, this is yet another excuse to count their blessings.

Given the demands of work, the best present my husband and I can give each other these days is time - time to enjoy idle chatter, time to soak in the sea view from our apartment, time to just be alone. We plan to get home before 8pm today, share a takeout dinner in the balcony and maybe take a stroll along the beach if there's time after doing the laundry.

Nothing fanciful, but everything meaningful.

What are your plans for today?

Now if only every girl realised this...hahaha

But honestly, which girl wouldn't like flowers to be given to her? Even if she doesn't expect it, wouldn't it still give her some joy to actually receive flowers on that day? *ponders* She would know that its expensive, but the guy is still willing to buy for her (or perhaps some other gift other than flowers) and wouldn't that actually make her more happy? So conclusion? Girls who do not expect anything actually deserve flowers more than those who actually EXPECT it. At least I think so anyway...

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I couldn't fall asleep last night. I miss my laptop :( I really hope its at IBM already, and not wrongly delivered to some dirty guys' hands or hiding somewhere in the DHL depot :(

Ang moh bashing

To prevent you all from suffering from depression while reading my blog (that is if you all care about me enough lah...), here's a link to amuse you all (taken from Lyndon's blog). I think the comics are quite well drawn and really funny. Who needs foreign talent?!



Oh yeah, by the way, whoever laughs at Singaporeans queuing up for Hellp Kitty deserves a tight slap. Even ang mohs also queue up for stupid black and white wrist bands, so much so that they have a quota and I can't get enough for my friends. They also recognised me when I queued up a second time. Why? Coz I am a Chinese. (note the irony here...) Would they recognise ang mohs and blacks when there are so many of them? Definitely not.

Stupid anti-racism wrist bands.

The only ones enjoying it are Nike bosses who are laughing all the way to the bank.

Safeway Savers Bread

You know what they are...

Every morning, the shelves are stacked full of them. Everyday, the old loaves are replaced by new loaves and the cycle goes on and on. They are very much dispensable and replaceable. Nobody bothers about those left on the shelves at the end of the day. They will be disposed of, no big deal. They are so common anyway.

They are also cheap too. For just 25p, you can get one loaf. Disgustingly cheap. So easily affordable, even the tramps on the streets outside Russell Square tube can afford an entire loaf if they sit for 15 minutes. No need to spend any effort at all to buy them.

However, their quality is very poor too. A slice crumbles easily. Bread crumbs get all over the table when you try to spread them. Crumbs drop out of your grasp and mouth when you start eating them. The bread sticks to your teeth as you try to chew and digest it. Too much effort needed to eat it and it's not nice. I repeat: NOT NICE.

So nobody likes Safeway Savers Bread. You only buy it if you are damn poor. As soon as you can afford it, you go for something better. Why stick with Safeway Savers Bread when you can go for Hovis or Kings Mill? After all Savers Bread is always there, they are plentiful, and they are cheap. No need to spend any effort at all. If you become poor again, can always go back to Savers Bread, it will not run away. But for now, better aim for and grab as much Hovis as you can before it runs out!

When you are rich already and are enjoying that slice of Hovis, do you think of Savers Bread? Do you care to even remember, let alone appreciate the feeling of full-ness that it once gave you? Do you remember that last time, that 25p loaf of Savers Bread at least prevented you from going hungry?

Thought not.

Nobody likes Safeway Savers Bread.

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The laptop was delivered to Stratford yesterday. With the help of streetmap.co.uk and a map. Fucking DHL even ran out of proper receipts when I delivered it there. I only had a handwritten acknowledgment slip.

I can only pray that my laptop does not get lost. But I should prepare myself for the worst.

I WANT MY IBM T23 BACK!!!!!!

As if that wasn't enough...

You know the feeling when the whole world starts crashing in on you?

My hard disk didn't crash.

Instead Irving and his friend think that something in my laptop must have burnt or short circuited or whatever. Which means my warranty might be fucked. I really don't know what might have spilled onto it causing it to short...I never do anything at all! But given my luck nowadays...I believe I should be mentally prepared for an Indian accented caller to say that the warranty does not cover it. And I might have to pay upwards of 600 pounds for the repairs. I am fucked.

I did buy insurance for my laptop in the beginning of the academic year when I bought insurance for my room. All is fine and well until I read the last line: I must provide proof that I OWN the laptop.

My receipt is back in Singapore!!!!

To make it worse, I think when I bought my laptop, I put my father's name on the receipt since he paid for it. It was my decision. So now the insurance company can say that the laptop is not mine. My only hope is that they accept the receipt for my repairing the LCD screen.

I am sooooo fucked.

I hereby declare myself persona non grata. Please people, if you see me on the streets, run and hide as far away as you can. I have so much bad luck that anybody within a metre of me will get it. Dont say hi, don't wave, don't do anything. Seriously I am drenched in showers of suey-ness for now. I haven't even mentioned that I got rejected for United vs FUlham tickets, exactly when I need them desperately because Leon is coming over from the US that weekend.

Just kill me.

Unhappy Valentines' Day for TosH

Not sure how to structure this post into a coherent piece since soooo many things happened so forgive me if this piece seems a little haphazard.

Let me get the most du lan thing out of the way.

My hard disk crashed.

KAN NI NA BE CHAO JIBYE!!!!!!

My laptop is a fucking IBM!! It is not supposed to crash!! I didn't drop it. I didn't hammer it. I typed "bye bye" on MSN, went to change clothes to go out to watch Man City vs United, took a look at the screen before going out and there were funny lines across the screen. I couldn't get into Windows after rebooting.

And the world starting caving in on me as it dawned upon me that I had lost ALL my precious photos from my Europe and Japan tours, birthday and CNY celebrations, matches etc. Not to mention 6 Gb of music files as well. And when I got to the pub, I discovered BOTH Giggs and Ronaldo were not starting, Fortune and Fletcher started on the wings. It was seriously a case of WTF!!!

Heng got Richard Dunne. What a finish for the second own goal. *applause*. Even Pele would have been proud of that goal. As John remarked when the screen focused on Dunne's face: "What have I DUNNE?"

Eh come on lah, quite funny line right...laugh leh.

And so on to today, a frantic series of phone calls to IBM service centres etc. I reiterate that...

I HATE OUTSOURCING.

I can't even begin to describe my dulan ness whenever I have an urgent problem to settle and when I call, I hear an Indian accent. I have nothing against Indians (stop sniggering behind!) but I am absolutely against Indian accents. You are bloody servicing the UK market, you jolly well speak PROPER English. I mean seriously.. everybody complains about Singlish. But what is so different then about Indian accented English when people also have problems understanding what they are saying? JIbye. So much time was spent on spelling out every alphabet and reconfirming every sentence that the guy said.

And the most jibye thing of all? They have no local knowledge at all. The place where I have to leave my laptop is in bloody Stratford. Far far away in the South China Sea... The address he gave me is DHL Depot, Unit I and J, EAST CROSS CENTRE, Stratford, E15 2HN. No ROAD NAME. How the hell am I going to find a building in the whole of Stratford?!?!?!!?

Me: Do you know how to get there?
Annoying Indian accent: No.

-Silence-

No attempts at all to help find out how to get there. Because he is in INDIA, that's why!! He then suggested that I can post it to the DHL depot and then DHL will bring it to IBM. All very nice, except that I had explained to him a minute ago that I was scared that my laptop would get lost in the post. Why doesn't it register in his head? Because people in India don't fucking know ROYAL MAIL is screwed up!!!!

So people in Singapore, be glad that Singapore is small. Sometimes it is an advantage. When you bring your laptop for servicing, it is at some convenient location and they don't need to send it to ANOTHER town to repair it.

Another thing was that once I send my laptop for repair, all my data would really be goodbye. So I phoned Irving to ask him how much data recovery would cost. And the answer was prohibitive. And then the first sign of St Valentine appeared. Irving asked me to bring my laptop to him so that he can take a look at it. To cut a long story short, he saved my data.

THANK YOU IRVING!!!! LIFE SAVIOUR!!!!

Phew...my photos...my precious. TosH hereby swears to back up not only photos he haven't printed, but also ALL his photos and music when he gets his laptop back. So at least my data is safe now. But still got to make a trip to Stratford, make numerous calls to IBM, (maybe) buy a new hard disk etc. Sigh... I am dying without my laptop :(

And so I went out to look at hard disk drives along Tottenham COurt Road, Sim Lim Square of London. Being Vday, lots of people were holding bouquets along the roads, some big some small, some roses and some were other flowers. I had a glimpse at the price of some bouquets in shops and they were SO expensive!! 25 pounds for a small bouquet of flowers (no roses)!!! Wah kao... I didn't even dare to see the price of the roses.

It does make the $2.50 per stalk that my sister is selling in NUS look so much cheaper. Yupz yupz my sister is ENTREPRENEUR!! Quite impressed by her. I have never had the guts (nor the business ideas) to do a small business on my own. The fear of losing money would always prevent me from being one. So I have developed new found respect for my sister. Hope her business venture went well today.

And this leads me onto the problems of Singapore. One of my friends specially flew over from US to see his girlfriend in London. (You can do so many stunts when you are rich...=( ) And we met up for lunch and had (strictly speaking the 3 of them talked while I listened, trying hard to understand half the time) a discussion about the problems with Singapore. I really do agree with the point that Singapore/Singaporeans are too judgmental. In fact, I am extremely guilty of that. For example, when I saw a guy with a bouquet of flowers wrapped in Sainsburys' (a supermarket like NTUC in Singapore) plastic bag, I automatically conclude that he is a cheapo. (Yes I did see a guy like that, I sincerely hope that he remembers to throw the plastic bag away, if not he is going to learn an unforgettable lesson...) We judge everything based on results and not on effort. We have no room for failures. I love Singapore, but this is one area where if I had one wish for Singapore, I would wish for it to change. Let's all try not to judge people on their occupations, their salaries, their failures and also the language they speak ok?

YES THAT INCLUDES YOU FUCKING JIBYE BOYFRIEND OF MY COUSIN! JUST BECAUSE MY PARENTS DON'T KNOW ENGLISH DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN TALK BAD ABOUT THEM IN ENGLISH YOU FUCKER!

Just because my parents don't eat eel and doesn't understand English doesn't mean it is ok for you to say to your girlfriend that "Even if we don't tell them its eel they also don't know right". Going by your logic, if we don't tell Muslims and let them eat pork its ok? Go and stick your fucking marketing jibye manager up your arse. 0 PR skills still want to do marketing.

Anyway yeah, quite impressed with the thoughts and ideas of my 3 friends. Though I really feel that some of their ideas are not desirable, like affirmative action (positive discrimination to put it simply) it is not important. What is important is that they retain the enthusiasm and concern they have for the future of Singapore. As long as that continues, then it is all that Singapore can ask for really. Not like me who is contented to remain a heartlander and watch football only. I will fight for Singapore if there is war (though I will be killed almost immediately) but I am absolutely clueless in trying to see where Singapore should be heading in the future.

So I guess I would end this damn long post on this rather I-am-useless note. Just to further this useless mood a little.. I just discovered I am damn fucking suey. The shop along Regent St can just disappear into thin air when I am trying to find it. I walked to Covent Garden to see if there is another branch and couldn't find any. Just now when I looked on the Internet, I discovered that I literally WALKED PAST THE SHOP WITHOUT FINDING IT. wtf man.... When you are suey, you are really suey I tell ya...

Amsterdam

How time flies. Can't believe it's already been a week since I went to Amsterdam. This time last week I was stuffing myself silly with Indonesian food. Now I am eating cheapo noodles. What a contrast.

But yeah anyway I went to Amsterdam from Saturday to Monday (no I didn't skip school, I have no lessons on Mondays). A bit short on sightseeing, but overall it was an enjoyable trip. Think this time it is easier to divide the trip into things that we did or saw.

So when 6 guys go travelling, what is the main objective (besides looking for chio bus lah...)? To watch football lor, what else? We went to watch Ajax Amsterdam vs FC Twente and signed up for a match day tour package too.


Crest of Ajax. For those of you who don't follow football, Ajax is the biggest club in Holland, the originator (I think, or at least they made it famous) of the 4-3-3 formation and the total football style. Over the years they had produced truck loads of footballers for the Dutch national team from the likes of Johann Cruyff to Dennis Bergkamp, Clarence Seedorf to present day gems like Rafael Van Der Vaart and Johnny Heitinga. I remember there was one season in the mid 90s when they went a whole league season unbeaten and also beat Real Madrid 2-0 in the Champions League and had a lot of goals disallowed, that's how dominant they were.


Yeah, that's the name of the tour. It wasn't very comprehensive, lacking the usual tour of the changing rooms etc which was understandable as it was a match day.


But still we got a chance to see the players' tunnel and go to the pitch side where the Ajax people took a photo of 6 of us but I can't scan it onto my computer.


Pitch side. Don't ask me what the figure head represents because I don't know. But it does look quite nice actually.


The pitch and the big screen


Some of the honours won by Ajax.


The away fans' stand is right in the middle. They have walls around that section and it is also covered by netting to prevent things from being thrown into the away stand. Quite scary to think that it is actually necessary, for I have never seen anything like that before.


The away stand, should be able to see the netting and the walls around it more clearly now.


So it was off to the museum next. This is confirmation of Ajax being one of the top clubs in Europe, having won 4 European Cups.....


as well as numerous Dutch league titles. The two shields in the lower row are for the Dutch league.


The "megastore"


Then it was off to De Toekomst, which I think is the youth academy of Ajax. We had our lunch there and saw a lot of young Ajax trainees there too. I think they just finished a match and was having their lunch as well. Maybe some of them will make it big....?




The Amsterdam ArenA. Quite impressed with the stadium itself actually, looks rather nice, like a spaceship. I think I have a fetish for stadiums.


Irving, Derrick and me. Scarves were given as part of the tour. But I got a lousy design...damn...


Players warming up before the match.


Where the so called "F-side" is seated, something like the Stretford End of Old Trafford. When the ArenA opened sometime in the late 90s, the F side were located in various parts of the stadium and according to the tour guide, they "missed" each other and thus now they are seated together. I think they are quite violent fans :P Anyway if you look closely you can see the Star of David (I think that's what it's called, anybody knows for sure?) of the Jews hanging in the middle. According to Li Yeng who went to Amsterdam last year, the Ajax fans are hated by everyone (like the Jews, not very politically correct to say that but that is what she was told if I don't remember wrongly) and thus have the nickname "Jews". But the Ajax fans don't give two hoots about it and actually adopted it. Thus sometimes you can see the Israel flag flying sometimes when Ajax fans celebrate their league titles.



The other end of the pitch where the 'ultras' are seated (at the flag on the left side). Just before kickoff they have a song which was played over the PA system (like You'll Never Walk Alone at Anfield) and everyone sang and the 2 flags rose from the bottom and were passed all the way up. I must say I am quite impressed with the effect. By the way I think the 'ultras' are another group of qutie hardcore fans because most of the singing originated from that side of the crowd.


The 100+ or so FC Twente fans having a good time in the cage. The guy in the bottom right hand corner wearing white is one cool dude. He wore sunglasses to watch the match and smoked a joint (I think its cannabis, a recreational drug, more about that later...) which was as big as a cigar!! WTF....


The players coming out


The players shaking hands


The ultras setting off flares. Again first time I see such things for they are banned in UK I think. Quite interesting but the smoke obscures the view which is quite shitty. And the smell is quite strong too. We could smell it even when we were seated on the other side of the pitch.


The band conductor. The quality of football on offer was rather poor. Ajax started off well and took the lead but damn fucked themselves by allowing Twente back into the game despite having Rozales the right winger and Heitinga playing really well. I was rather impressed with Heitinga. Not sure if its because the Dutch league is poor but he seemed to be able to play the Roy Keane role really well. The central defender with number 3 for Twente also caught our eyes. He played like Jaap Stam.

So with the poor match on offer on the pitch, my attention was continually distracted by this band conductor. First time I have seen a proper band allowed inside the stadium. Every once in a while this conductor would stand up and wave his hands and ask the band to play some music to liven up the atmosphere as well as encourage the rest of the spectators to sing along. He looked really passionate but I couldnt tell whether he had passion for music or for Ajax. But he really amused me nevertheless.

The next major thing we did in Amsterdam was to eat. Just to give you all a shock. The accommodation and match package was already fully paid for before we left and I brought along 120 Euros for the 3 days for food and other expenses. And it WASN'T enough. In fact almost all of us didn't have enough and had to use our cards at least once. I still owe my friend 20 Euros and had 20 pounds charged to my card. So you can just imagine how much we spent on food.


Dutch pancakes, which we had for breakfast/lunch on the first day. Cost: 8 Euros.

Ok ok I know it looks like an omlette but let me reassure you that its not. Dutch pancakes is just about the only unique Dutch dish I know and I really like it a lot. I am not usually a person who likes such 'pastry' stuff but I still like Dutch pancakes. You all must try if you all have a chance!!


Rijsttafel, or Indonesian rice table, which we had for dinner on the first night. Cost: 19 Euros per person.

According to Irving, its because Indonesia was once a Dutch colony and so that's why you can find brilliant Indonesian food in Holland. Rijsttafel is a set meal with a lot of dishes eaten with rice. For our set, we had curry chicken, soy sauce pork, satay, vegetables etc etc. I can't remember all the dishes but most were very very nice to eat. It helped that all of us were hungry also. One word of caution though, the rice is most probably not free flow. We ended up having to pay 3 or 4 Euros extra per person coz we ordered a lot of extra bowls of rice. Don't be smart aleck and say that we should have asked because we did ask but the waitress English CMI and misunderstood our question of whether the rice was free or not. She thought we just wanted more rice and just brought it to us with us assuming its free. So if in doubt, don't order.


Portuguese tapas buffet, which we had for dinner on second day. Cost: 22 Euros per person.

Not sure if I had mentioned tapas in my email about Spain last time. Just in case I didn't, tapas is a term for small Spanish dishes. Usually they eat it for lunch. And so it was quite a surprise that this Portuguese restaurant offered tapas 'buffet' for dinner also. At first we thought it was a real buffet as in all the dishes were free flow but apparently its not. I think buffet in the ang moh context is a set meal with a lot of dishes but not refillable. So beware! Anyway as it is we didnt need a refill at all coz there was so much food that we nearly couldnt finish. And the food was as usual superb. I once again have to reiterate that Spanish and Italian food are damn nice. Think I should go learn how to cook then can use to xian girls. hahahahaha.


Apple tart from Apple Winkel near Noodermarkt. Cost: 2-3 Euros per slice (not sure)

The Apple Winkel shop is renowned for having the best apple tart in Amsterdam as claimed by the locals. It was told to Li Yeng and also to us by the person at our hostel. And it really is quite nice (that's a lot coming from me who doesn't like pastry stuff...). But then it also helps that the shop has...


Yes a chio waitress :P

Some usual sightseeing photos...:



Koninklijk Palace


Raadhuisstraat. I think this street is epecially nice. All of the houses here have balconies. In fact I think a lot of streets in Amsterdam can be attractions in themselves.


Dam Square with the National Monument, fondly known as Big Dick....hahahaha


Nieuwe Markt


Anne Frank Huis (House)


Derrick and me with statue of Anne Frank.

Anne Frank is this famous little Jewish girl who wrote a diary while she was hiding in an attic to escape from German soldiers. Not really sure about the exact story. But the attic she hid in and the original diary is displayed in this house. Unfortunately we didn't have enough time to go in.

Some pictures of canals in Amsterdam. Amsterdam has a lot of canals (remember your secondary school geography classes about land reclamation in the Netherlands? haha) and some of them are really scenic. Some photos of canals:








The photo above shows something like a boat house. There are lots of thems in various canals but I am not too sure whether people actually live in them or are they shops or what.


Ice skating rink outside Rijksmuseum.


Me in front of the ice skating rink. Please ignore idiot on the left.

Another thing that Holland is famous for is tulips. The Chinese name for tulips is yu jing xiang (blogger doesn't display chinese characters properly :( ) Anyway I am quite impressed with my mum coz she told me the yu jing xiang term before I left for Amsterdam. Even my mum knows what Holland is famous for. Damn I must buck up!!


The zhao1 pai2 says it all...Tulips from Amsterdam in Bloemen Markt (a flower market)


Tulips of various colours! Very very nice. Unfortunately the picture is blur. Shitty photo taking skills.


A clearer but not so good photo. The tulips are rather cheap too. You can get 50 stalks of tulips for 7.50 Euros. In UK it costs like 4 or 5 pounds for a miserable bunch.


School bus outside Van Gogh museum. Yes we act arty farty and went inside but ok lah, saw the famous sunflowers painting. Apparently he painted quite a few sunflower paintings...hmm... Anyway doesn't this look the the magic school bus from the cartoon? hahaha, wonder if it can fly....

Ok I guess most of you all must be bored by now...that is if you had read until this point! Anyway Amsterdam is not called vice city for nothing.... I really like the following photo:


Not that I think being gay or lesbian is a vice but this is the most suitable section to put it in.


See the word in the top right of the door? Yes you never read wrongly... DA MA. Recreational drugs are totally legal in Holland and walking along the streets of Amsterdam, the smell of pot is unmistakable. It is the only place in the world where you can smoke pot beside a policeman without the policeman batting an eyelid. In Amsterdam, there are a lot of shops which are called 'coffee shops'. But they are not the Singapore kopi tiams. They are a term for shops selling drugs etc. They are dimly lit bars with tables and couches. Candles are available on the tables for people to light up and the smell of weed fills the air totally. It somehow feels decadent to be inside but at the same time it feels really relaxing, like what is the big deal.... but I didn't smoke lah. Shihua is still a good boy. Or should I say humji boy. Coz need to go back NS mah.... oh yeah you can buy seeds to grow from just about anywhere too...even at the flower market! WTF...

Next vice: Sex...




Amsterdam is also famous for its red light district....so how can the 6 of us miss out on it leh? hahahaa. Yeah anyway there red light district is spread over an area with numerous alleys and side streets. The unmistakable red neon lights hang over each window-like door and in it, the prostitutes strut their stuff in their underwear which looks like they are fluorescent because of the neon lights. It really is an eye opener for me because I had walked about in Geylang before. Anyway my photos aren't very clear because we aren't allowed to take photos. Heard horror stories about bouncers bashing up camera-taking tourists but didn't actually see any bouncers. Wonder who protects these prostitutes actually. Quite pity them actually....what if they meet some psycho killer?? Hai... anyway the small lighted spots in the photos are the underwear...

AND NO I DIDN'T DO IT!! haha

Anyway yeah I guess this is the end. Amsterdam is quite a nice place. Should go if have a chance!